Today's Worst Person In The World

A Wisconsin Teenager was convicted and sentenced for 15 years for facebook blackmail. The male teenager posed as a teenage girl on facebook and tricked fellow male classmates to send naked pictures of themselves to him. Once in possession of the pictures AND videos the wisconsin teen used the pics as blackmail. He told his classmates that he would release the photos or videos if they didn't engage in some sort of sex act with him. Seven of his classmates were fearful enough that they actually had sex with this dude (which he also video taped and photographed).

You can read the rest of the story here:

I don't even no were to begin with my disgust. Obviously the kid is insane and a dirt ball. What kind of sick teenage boy uses the horniness of other teenage boys against them! Not to make too much light of an awful crime but there is a code amongst horny teenagers and using their desperate need to get laid for the purposes of black mail is definitely a no-no.

Jack Black Is Not Funny...

O.K. So I spent part of my weekend in L.A. going to a comedy benefit show at the Nokia Theater in downtown L.A. When I originally bought the tickets months ago (way back in November I believe) the show was to be hosted by Will Ferrell and headlined by Demetri Martin and Zack Galifinakis. "Awesome," i thought. I immediately bought some tickets and was geeked for a good time. Well sometime in January Zac Galifinakis' name was taken off the advertisements. I got a little nervous. But I went from nervous to horrified when it was announced that Tenacious D would be added to the bill. I held out hope. I prayed that I would be proven wrong. But unfortunately I was correct. Jack Black is NOT funny. The man is a void of comedy. He is a black hole of humor. I assure you that all the artist at the show are less funny just because he was in their general proximity.

I don't understand how this guy has a career? If being fat and annoying gets you to the top in show business I wish someone would have told me! It was bad enough they weren't funny. It was worse that they CLOSED the freaking show. Song after song with no one laughing. It was death. And again, for all the Jack Black lovers who are going to give me a hard time: I wanted him to be funny. I wanted to be wrong. But the whole freaking crowd just sat there nervously watching this awkward unfunny act. Everyone just sat there uncomfortably hoping against hope that they would do something to salvage. People would scream as they went into the opening cords of some of their "hit songs." But thirty seconds in the same people were just sitting there with a look on their face as if to say, "when did I ever laugh at this?"

Thats a good question. Here is my theory. Jack Black/Tenacious D fans are people who hear Tenacious D in college. At that point in their lives folks are a weird combination of being altered by some sort of drug mixed with college age immaturity/stupidity. So it doesn't strike me as strange that someone like that would think to themselves, "wow this is funny." Who else could listen to songs, whose only purpose seem to be to allow Jack Black to use words like "shit", "fuck" and "motherfucker" and think thats funny? That maybe funny the first time. But guess what? That shit gets old real quick.

That one of the bigger the problem with Tenacious D, unlike Flight of the Conchords the song's lyrics aren't funny. Tenacious D's punchline is the cuss word. If you grow out of thinking the word "cock" is funny then you aren't going to laugh at a Tenacious D performance. And that was the total vibe at L.A. Live last night. bunch of people who remember Tenacious D being funny 10 years ago all of a sudden sat in front of that same group and went, "oh wait a minute. this is actually pretty shitty."

I guess what I am saying is: Jack Black. Stop it. Seriously. You're not funny.

She Proved Them Right...

As some of you may now Amy Bishop was University of Alabama professor who is accused of opening fire and killing a number of colleagues after being denied tenure. It's an absolute tragedy. Lives have been unbelievably altered. However, on the bright side doesn't this validate the board's decision to deny her tenure? I mean we can all agree they made the decision right? Clearly somebody who reacts this way to a rejection of tenure shouldn't have been given tenure. Maybe a strongly worded letter would have been a better response. Not getting a gun and shooting three staff members during a faculty meeting.

By the way Prof. Bishop had a 3.4 rating on ratemyprofessor.com (out of 5). Which goes to show, what the f*** do 19-21 year olds know about rating a professor? Answer: Nothing.

Things I Didn't Expect To See...

This is what I ran into while on the CNN.com health page:

OSCARS

Oscar nominations came out today. At first I was a little skeptical of expanding the best picture category to 10 nominees but I actually like the way it worked out. It allows for deserving commercially successful films to get their due recognition. It also allows films in genres that are not normally recognized (animation and sci-fi) to get their moment in the limelight. The following are films and actors I am rooting for (not necessarily the poeple who I think will win):

Best Picture: I would love to see Up win but lets face it, it has a snowball's chance in hell. Speaking of hot places I hope the Hurt Locker wins. However, the film hasn't gotten a lot of public buzz and may be overwhelmed by the hype of Avatar.

Best Actress: This thing is a freaking toss up. After getting screwed over the last two years Meryl Streep may get a "make up" Oscar for Julie and Julia, which is a far less impressive performance then what she pulled off in Doubt and the Devil Wears Prada. Hellen Merian is a always a favorite in this category and I can see this category being used to recognize "An Education". Personally, I am rooting for Gaby Sidibe or Sandra Bullock.

Best Actor: Micahel Stuhlbarg! How did this guy NOT get nominated for his performance in A Serious Man! so upset about this. There will be serious buzz for Jeremy Renner and Colin Firth (deservingly so) but I think this one is headed Jeff Bridge's way.

Supporting Actor: Christopher Waltz - no one else even needs to show up.

Supporting Actress: Monique (I hope she refers to the other nominees as "skinny bitches").

Director: Kathryn Bigelow. I really hope James Cameron doesn't win for this one. I don't know why. I know he did is amazing things with regards to redefining film making but directing is about being able to tell a story and thats what Ms. Bigelow does in the Hurt Locker.

Screenplay Original: A Serious Man (one of my top four favorite movies of the year)

Screenplay Adapted: Up In The Air (no way the genius of the young Reitman goes unrecognized on Oscar night)