I'm Surprisingly OK with the Harlem Shake.

This is a quick post but as I see and feel the backlash coming against the Harlem Shake I gotta say, 'I don't know where the haters are coming from?'

Where were these people when PSY was in our face for almost a whole year?

Plus, if we are going to have viral music artist who take over the internet I'm proud to say that this one is American!!! USA USA USA.

Also the great thing about the Harlem Shake movement is that it's only 30 seconds. In. Out. BOOM! Remember last year when everyone and their mother was doing a Call Me Maybe lip dub video? Those things were three minutes long. After 30 seconds you get the point, I don't need to watch anything longer.

Plus the Harlem Shake phenomenon leads us to explore other topics such as:
How the hell did this start?
Why isn't the Harlem Shake a limited time drink from McDonalds yet?
Why isn't Dave Chapelle getting more credit for keeping the Harlem Shake alive as a dance?

Baauer, Harlem, your shake, people with free time on your hands and the internet, you have my support.

Plus anything that gets Al Roker to do this is great in my book:

Super Bowl 47

So it's time again for the big game.

So I did some research yesterday on what I thought would be keys to the game.

Turnovers and Sacks:

Terrell Suggs is not a handsome man.

San Francisco has been great at protecting their quarterback and ball. SF only allowed two sacks and two turnovers this postseason. In contrast the Ravens have caused 6 sacks and 8 forced turnovers (3 and 6 respectively in the last two games). So the key would appear to be getting pressure on SF quarterback Colin Kaepernick and force some bad throws. Here's the problem, the Ravens have faced two older, less mobile quarterbacks in their last two games. If they force Colin Kaepernick to break the pocket, Kaepernick can extend the play and create some big plays.

Big Plays:

The Baltimore Ravens apparently love this pose.

San Francisco has had 6 plays of over 25 yards this postseason and this is something that an older Ravens team is going to have to avoid to win this game. 

It goes without saying that the Ravens have relied heavily on their big play making ability over the course of their three  playoff games. With the San Francisco defense focused on Ravens receivers Torrey Smith and Anquan Boldin I think there is a possibility for third wide receiver Jacoby Jones and running back Ray Rice to exploit the middle of the field and break some big yardage plays.

The Running Game

There's no way to do this and not look like a tool.

The Ravens run defense has gotten better over the course of their three playoff games giving up 151 yards, 125 yards and 108 yards in that order. However, they face a three headed running threat tonight: QB Colin Kaepernick and running backs Frank Gore and La'Michael James. 

James is a forgotten part of this combo but with backfield defenders forced to spy Kaepernick and Gore pounding the ball between the tackles James has the explosiveness to break a big play. 

How good is the San Francisco running game?

They had over 300 yards running against Green Bay and 150 against the Falcons in a game where they trailed for most of the first half and were forced to throw the ball more than they'd like. 

As for the Ravens running over 125 yards would be a big win against San Francisco's run defense and would force the secondary to not cheat on their coverage.

Special Teams and the new Red Zone

David Akers and 49er fans hope to look happier after SB47

Inspite of the two, count em': two, special teams touchdowns they allowed against Denver Baltimore's special teams have been amongst the best in the league. but they will be facing the afore mentioned La'Michael James. So this should be an interesting battle.

If I were a fan of either team I would be worried about my field goal unit. Even though Ravens rookie kicker Justin Tucker has made some big kicks this season (against New England early in the season and at Denver in the playoffs he is still a rookie). 

And if there were a prop bet for "player most likely to receive death threats via Twitter after then game" it would be San Francisco kicker David Akers. He's missed 13 field goals including 5 in the last five games. That's why the 30 yard line should be considered the red zone for this game. If either team gets inside the 30 they should feel a sense of urgency to not leave it to their kicker to put points on the board.

Final Prediction:
If you average the margin of victory from Super Bowl 18-33 that number would have been nearly 18 points. There was a time when the Super Bowl meant watching one team get killed by another. In recent years we've had great nail biters. But something leads me to believe that we are going to have a double digit victory tonight. 

As much as I am trying to convince myself that the Ravens will win the 49ers have the personnel on offense to exploit an aging defense. The Ravens lost each time they faced an elusive NFC quarterback this season Michael Vick and RGIII. And on defense the 49ers have enough athletes to shut down the big play making skills of the Ravens. The only way i can see the Ravens winning is if they force atleast two turnovers and Anquan Boldin and Ray Rice have 100 yards a piece of offense. 

Otherwise: 28-17 San Francisco

Manti and The Real Girl

I don't even know where to begin with this Manti Te'o story.

I figured i just collect some of the best jokes I've made and heard:

On December 26, 2012 Mantai Te'o informed Notre Dame officials that he and the rest of his team had been cruelly deceived by sports writers that they deserved a shot at the national championship.


Well duh he's going to say his "fake girlfriend died. " he's going pro, first round. Bitches be gathering!!!

@Beanpole_brian: If Manti becomes sponsored by Match.com after all this, I cry foul

I am 10% nervous that Lane Kiffin may somehow be involved in this.

@SethMyers: These Te'o jokes are all very funny but let's all try and remember that a person who never existed is dead. 

@CaseyNewton: NOT YER DAME RT @daveweigel: 

@juliweiner: NYPOST headline submission: LEPRECONNED

If you having girl problems I feel bad for you son Manti Teo has 99 problems but a girl ain't one. - Jadeveon Clowny*

*p.s. this is the biggest smack down Jadeveon has made on a fellow football player since this:



@jerkstoremike Karl Rove is reporting that Manti Te'o's girlfriend still might be real. 

Not only did Greg McElroy win the national championship but his girlfriend is real!

@MichelleDBeadle Let all of you who haven't made up a lover be the ones to cast stones. Have you met my boyfriend, Mike? He's an astronaut.

Watching Madonna: Truth or Dare

Below is a running diary of my thoughts while watching Madonna's Truth or Dare on Christmas Eve:

Madonna’s hair is constantly being messed with. I think it’s being combed for 78% of her time on screen.

How embarrassed is Warren Beatty to be in this flick? He has the look of a guy who has been caught red handed dating someone he couldn’t possibly be interested in but really wants to have sex with;only he knows that this is now going to be documented on film for eternity. I am surprised he hasn’t destroyed all copies of this film to  keep Annette Benning from ever seeing it.

Woah! Kevin Costner mullet alert.

Sylvester Stallone did the voice over for Madonna’s brother Martin.

Woah! Madonna’s bare breast just flashed on the screen. I am now upset that I didn’t see this movie between the ages of 15-18.

Madonna has an old friend named Myra. Backstory on Myra is that she is a former drug absing stripper who had intimate knowledge of Madonna (allegedly). Myra asks for Madonna to be her next kid’s godmother. Madonna does more side stepping and dancing around this request then she’s done at any point on stage. I wonder if the ex-coked out stripper ever got a call from Madonna after the tour was over.

Madonna visiting her mother’s grave seems like a weird perfume/feminine hygiene product commercial if you watch it without audio.

Warren Beatty has a Nostradamus type moment about the future of American society when he looks into a camera and says, “She doesn’t want to live off camera, let alone say anything off camera. Why would you want to say something if it’s off camera? What’s the point of existing?” I’m not sure this isn’t a deleted scene from the Keeping Up With The Kardashians.

Some yahoo DJs interview back up dancers. The DJs seem like they are doing an impersonation of the DJ 3000.

The Simpsons DJ - 3000 from Chronite on Vimeo.

The gay dancers openly mock a dancer who is rumored to be sleeping with Madonna. Who has the deleted the footage of this gay dancers and how can we get it to be released? These fools are hilarious.

Here is a shocker. Madonna is getting her hair done. 

I think watching this movie is making Madonna’s current british accent even more ridiculous.

The lack of cell phones or mentions of the internet in this film is becoming distracting.

The back up singers mock the idea of an old Madonna touring and exposing her breasts while preforming on tour. Um … let’s move on.

Sandra Berndhart sighting. This movie has become a slow death march. I think running a half marathon seemed shorter and less painful. 

Antonio Banderas shows up 

I think I’ve now come up with a rule for a Madonna: Truth or Dare drinking game: drink anytime someone who she is rumored to have had some kind of sex with shows up on screen (Beatty  x 2, stripper, Bernhardt, Banderas, Oliver her dancer). 

Madonna just gave felatio to a bottle. I still want this move to be over.

Oh, wait. Sean Penn was just mentioned does that count as a drink?

Two hours later and that is a wrap. My only question is has Lady Gaga decided to rip off the idea of doing a tour documentary too?

Rob Parker Has To Go.

Robert Parker is someone who I occasionally see on ESPN and he always seems to be below ESPN standards. After all, this is the same guy that reported that then Michigan State QB Kirk Cousins had gotten into a fight with fellow MSU athletes, even though Cousins was at home with his parents the whole night.

Cousins is now the backup QB for the Washington Redskins. Well, Mr. Parker went on ESPN's FIRST TAKE on Wednesday and went after the Redskins' starting QB Robert Griffin III. Mr. Parker question Mr. Griffin's blackness because of the race of his fiancé and a rumored political allegiance. You can watch his stupidity here:



I went to his Twitter timeline to see if he would back away or apologize for his comments. He did not. If anything. He went on to defend himself and posture towards those attacking him.

Mr. Parker was wrong by the way. He was not on First Take the next day. He ended up being indefinitely suspended by ESPN. I was so disgusted by not only his unbelievable inappropriate, prejudiced and thoughtless commentary but also his arrogance that I wrote the following to ESPN.

After thoughtful consideration I am writing to support the firing of Rob Parker. Mr. Parker's comments were thoughtless and hurtful. To question someone's identity and connection to their cultural or racial heritage by who they date, their political affiliation, speech or wear their hear is beneath the journalism I have come to expect from ESPN and other ABC properties. Even Stephen A Smith recognized this during the segment. Mr. Parker's defensiveness on Twitter further cemented my view.

I've come to realize that if you want to see change you have to do something about it. You have to be willing to call people out or ask that they be held accountable. It's not enough to stew and complain to like-minded people around you. Whether it's writing an email to ESPN, voting, volunteering, working on a campaign or anything else. Action begets action and that is the way towards change.

New Beginnings

Tomorrow will be the first time in 3 years that I will not be welcoming a new class of students to Sixth College at UC San Diego. I miss my friends, my co-workers and my students. But change is a part of life and I know that the students of Sixth College have an amazing group of people who will be there to help them, support them, teach them, help them grow and help them build long lasting and meaningful relationships.

For the RA staff that will welcome folks into Camp Snoopy and the Sixth College Apartments, I just want to say I miss y'all. But below is a reminder that this new year brings new opportunities. Opportunities for greatness that you all will seize. You all have so much potential and greatness inside of all of you and more importantly you all have the tools and personality to be an outstanding TEAM. Don't forget that. Below is the message I left you all with last May. I still mean every word.

Willing of the Halls is a very important ritual at Sixth because it recognizes the contributions of the past while also celebrating the potential of the future. It’s the passing of the torch from one person to another. It’s not just about passing on a building or some gifts, it’s about welcoming people into a Sixth College Res Life family and passing on the responsibility and the mantle of representing that family. 

Once your part of this family your part of it forever. Wether you know it or not the contributions of the hundred or so RAs who have been part of Sixth Res Life are in this room with us right now. At Sixth we don’t fear change because no one individual’s presence or effort is more important than the next. We value each other individually but we understand that only together can we serve something bigger than ourselves.

With that being said I want to announce that next year I will not be returning as an Assistant Resident Dean for Sixth College. I’ll be taking the position of Assistant Director of New Student Orientation and Family Programs at Rutgers University in New Jersey.

Some of you might be wondering what this exactly means or who will be replacing me. We don’t know that yet. But what I do know is that Marciano and Tony will do there best to find someone who values the things that make Sixth College great and will be a boss that you can count on to work hard for you and your students.

On a personal note I want to say that this change, while exciting, also makes me sad because I’ve grown attached to many of you who are returning and many of you who are joining our family next year. For those of you who I haven’t been as close to I am bummed out because I won’t be able to better know you and watch you reach your full potential. 

But like I said before, just because I am leaving doesn’t mean I still don’t belong to this family. I will still be a call, email or Facebook message away and I care enough about you all and this place that I’ll always be there for you. Don’t think of it as losing an ARD, think of it as gaining another one (probably a better one).

Lastly, I want to say something to all of you, but especially to those of you who know me well. Make me proud. Work hard. Celebrate change and don’t fear it or bemoan it. Remember that you always represent something bigger than yourself and that you can’t accomplish anything without the help and support of each other. All of life and it’s history has brought you to this moment. Wether you think it’s fate or just random occurrences think about all the things that had to happen to bring you together into this room. So enjoy it, value it, and take care of each other. 

The Hateable Dwight Howard

Dear Dwight Howard,

Shut up. Seriously. Please shut up. I am tired of hearing from, and about you. And I think I can say that most basketball fans feel them same way to. The big headline coming from Dwight’s sit down interview with ESPN’s Ric Bucher is that Dwight never wanted anyone to hate him. Really, Dwight? Well, you have a funny way of getting people not to hate you.

If you really look at his behavior over the last three years Howard has acted like an insane girlfriend that someone tolerates because they are hot.

First he declared that he wanted to create his own legacy, not follow in other people’s footsteps. An apparent reaction to people claiming that Howard would leave the Orlando Magic for the Los Angeles Lakers just as Shaquille O’Neal once had. He also didn’t want to be compared to the all time great Lakers’ center (George Mikan, Wilt Chamberlain, Kareem Abdul Jabbar, Shaq)

He then said he wanted to stay in Orlando.

Then he said he wanted to be traded.

Then he said he wanted to stay in Orlando.

People then wonder if Howard will ask Orlando to sign and trade him allowing him to make the maximum amount of money he can make on a new contract before the league's new collective bargaining agreement takes place. A sign and trade, for point of reference, is a loophole in the league's collective bargaining agreement. It incentivizes a player to sign with their current team, who can offer the player more money than another team, but then the team, as part of a mutual agreement will then trade the player to another team who will then inherit the player and their new contract. If Howard failed to sign a new contract with Orlando before it takes place he leaves money on the table. Guess, who failed get a new deal done.

Then he formally demanded a trade, but was only willing to go to one team, the New Jersey Nets.

When the trade couldn’t get done everyone expects Howard, who is unhappy with his General Manager, coach and just demanded a trade, to play out the rest of the season, go into free agency and play for a new team - more than likely the Nets. Instead, Howard inexplicably opts in to his one year extension to stay with the Orlando Magic for the 2012-2013 season. What? Mixed signals much?

Shortly after opting in to his one year extension he goes into ‘I hate it here in Orlando’ mode again and demands that his coach be fired. This leads to one of the great awkward interviews of all time.


Then after the 2011-2012 season ends he demands to be traded again. Again, saying he will only go to the Nets.

And finally, Dwight ‘Don’t compare me to Shaq, I want my own legacy’ Howard agrees to go to the Los Angeles Lakers. That’s right the same team he said he had no interest in going to from the beginning.

Oh and did we forget to mention that Mr. Howard won’t even be ready for the beginning of the season since he is coming off back surgery.

I mean can anyone look at his behavior and say, ‘oh yeah. that’s normal.' The guy acted like a schizophrenic through this entire process. If you don’t want people to hate you then don’t jerk them around. I know some people will say that Dwight was just ‘too nice and he didn’t stand up for himself and what he wanted. He wanted to make Orlando fans happy and that is why he sent mixed signals’. Well, I guess you can make that argument, but it would then be hard to explain that he is no longer in Orlando AND he managed to get his coach and GM fired (oh yea, that happened too). Oh and let’s not forget, he isn’t signed beyond this year so we may have to go through this type of circus again this coming summer. So Dwight, just shut up and play ball. After all, actions speak louder than words right.