Solitude versus Loneliness

The really satisfying moments I have working with student leaders come less frequently than they used to. But it always strikes me as special when one of them shares with me some personal insight that shines a light on me.

During a one on one this past week and R.A. told me, "I like solitude but I hate being alone."

As soon as I heard the words I thought, 'damn this kid hit it right on the head.' Solitude is all about having peace and enjoying the tranquility of taking time for yourself. Loneliness is the desperation and pain you feel when you don't feel that there is anyone there for you. In both instance you are "alone." But in solitude you have this sense of comfort. The time alone is about reflection or recharging your battery. When you are lonely the separation between yourself and other people seems like it will have no end. Loneliness makes us hate ourselves and wonder why we drive others away.

Maybe it's just me but I found my student's comment to be real interesting.