Savoring Life...

So I have been reading a book called The Jesuit Guide To (Almost) Everything. It is written by Father James Martin, S.J. He has recently been in the media because he has rebuked Glenn Beck's claims that social justice has no place in religion. I have really enjoyed the book. I am a very slow reader and one who gets distracted/bored easily. So reading a 130ish pages in two days is a pretty good indicator that I have enjoyed the book.

However, there have been a handful of times when the book has, for some reason or another made me contemplate my own mortality. I would begin to get nervous at the idea of death. I worry about falling ill, or losing my memory, becoming a burden for others. Yet when I really sit down and think about it I think I fear something else. I fear not fully enjoying my life. One of the tenants of the book is this idea of reflecting on our day, or what Father Martin calls being contemplative in action. In short to be contemplative in action means be able to reflect upon all the aspects of your daily life, the good, the bad, the banal. Its about taking the time to appreciate the good and beautiful things in your life and being aware of the bad parts too. Its about taking the time to reflect on the people in your life and how you interact with them. Contemplating the things that made you happiest and peaceful, while at the same time taking the time to think about the areas in which you have failed and need to improve.

I've said before that life isn't always fun and that life is difficult. I still hold that to be true. But at the same time I am being reminded that just because life can be hard and busy doesn't mean that I can't or shouldn't take the time to enjoy it. I should take the time to think about my day and my life and all that it is. Because at the end of the day life is like a good meal. A good meal is something you sit with, something you savor and appreciate and it should be the same with the lives we lead. So after sitting with this for a few days I have decided that I should be more contemplative in action. To think about myself as a person, about my desires, my short comings and appreciating my reality. Now I realize that it wasn't so much death I feared, as much as it was letting my life go by without taking the time to enjoy it.