Too Many Podcasts...

I am going to have to quit my job just so I can actually listen to all the podcasts I download each week. As of right now I typically download nineteen and a half hours worth of podcasts (This Week in Google, The Kevin and Bean Show, Adam Carolla Podcast, Jay and Silent Bob Get Old, Hollywood Babble-On: with Kevin Smith and Ralph Garman and The B.S. Report with Bill Simmons). The podcasts are a mixture of my interest in technology, old radio morning shows I used to listen to in LA, entertainment, and sports.

I love listening to all of these podcasts. i need to prep for my fantasy football league. BOOM! I listen to the B.S. Report to do my fantasy homework. Want to get the scoop on Google Me or learn how to use Gmail's new "priority inbox" efficiently? I have TWIG for that. As much as i love these shows there is no getting around the fact that 20 hours is a hell of a lot of content to go through in one week. I listen to it when i drive, while I get ready in the morning, for 30 minutes each night before I go to bed, when I go for walks...

I am crushed under the weight of podcasts. It's so easy to find something that you are really into and interesting personalities. I love Kevin smith but the man produces nearly eight hours of content a week! It's story-telling overload!

To make my dilemma worse, I have actually cut the number of podcasts I download down. I also used to download Meet The Press (now I just watching the online webcast) and the Parent Experiment; and no, i don't have any good explanation for why I was listening to a parenting podcast.

Patriots Don't Pick And Choose...

I am a political science major and someone who tries to be reasonable about politics and our world. Which is why the recent backlash against a proposed mosque near the site of the September 11 attacks has been so frustrating. Here are my problems with those who are protesting:

1. The mosque is being tied to radical muslim figures. however, what people are failing to mention is that the figure that is consistently being mentioned, but not by name (Iman Rauf), is the second largest shareholder in NEWCORP (aka FOX). How radical and extremist can the man be when he is the second largest shareholder in FOX! Unless this is some kind of Russel Edgington (True Blood reference) type of psych out, this is an argument with no teeth.

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The second is that the tragedy of 9/11 is so very real and painful that building a mosque so close to the site of the attacks is rubbing salt in the wound. here is my problem with that. First, it associates Islam with what the attackers of 9/11 did. This of course continues an incredibly stupid and damaging cycle of "the terrorist were muslim, they did it because of Islam, Islam is bad, muslims are terrorist." I mean that whole it's too close to the site argument really boils down to "i have tied Islam to this negative experience. I blame is Islam and thus I don't want it around the site." The fact is that what these people did was because they were psychos and not because they were muslim.

Third argument. the LA Times quoted a protestor as saying:

"Everyone has closure when they lose someone," said O'Shea, a paralegal. "We'll never have closure."

That simply isn't true.

Not everyone has closure after a traumatic event. in fact most people don't. People are more likely to find peace after a traumatic event, not closure. Closure is about something you receive from others, which we can't count on happening. While, finding peace about giving something to yourself through meaningful, thoughtful reflection and resiliency. The problem is we have become "soft" (for lack of a better word) as a nation. We don't want to deal with negative things, or things that make us think and challenge us. so we do crap like this were we find the dumbest freaking argument in order to avoid thinking critically. Which brings me to my next point...

YOU ARE NEW YORKERS! You people are supposed to be the "toughest, thickest skinned, bring em on, we don't care what you think or do" people in our country. And now you can't emotionally deal with a completely unrelated mosque being built two blocks from the site of WTC. C'mon. If you can deal with this, if you can't find peace and resolve to move forward without having this single event (continue) to change the geography of your city, what hope is there for the rest of us?

Fourth, another protester said:

"They want to build a memorial to the terrorists before a memorial to the victims."

This proves my first point. Also, this whole thing about a memorial victim has nothing to do with this issue. If anything this proves, again, our lack of resolve and ability to get things done.

Lastly, patriots don't pick and choose the principles that we choose to uphold. The reason they are so meaningful is because they are supposed to guide us in difficult moments. This nation was founded on the principles of religious tolerance and this is as good a test as any of that principle. It would be a shame if we failed it. Those towers may no longer stand but we must have the courage to stand. To stand for principles that have guided us. To show the resolve to live by those principles even when they are painful, because it's the right thing to do.

The Power of Family...

I realized this week, just yesterday in fact, that in the near future I will play a patriarchal role in my family. Both sides. Mom and dad's. While my family has churned out incredibly strong and intelligent women who play leading roles in their families, there is always this reverence and respect for my grandfathers. Normally, that reverence and respect would be passed down to their children (their male children) upon their passing. But I don't think that will happen. Their have been too many public indiscretions and too many character flaws for them to be candidates.

I on the other hand, because of the level of education I have achieved and the type of work I do, am someone who elicits a sense of pride and trust from my family. I believe that they would be more than willing to trust me with playing a role in leading our family.

Maybe I have always subconsciously known this. Maybe that's why I worry about them as much as I do. It's probably why I have always felt a sense of responsibility and duty. Maybe that's why I try to help family as much as I can. Maybe that's why I have always feel guilt when I think of family members as burdens. Maybe I get anxious about my ability to love and care, because at some point it will be my job to move our family, in it's totality, into the future. And I want to do so in a way that shows care and love for all of my family, not just parts of it.

Maybe, I am just over thinking things. Maybe there is no such thing as a patriarch in my family. Maybe it's just a projection of my own making used to make sense of how my family interacts with itself.

Whatever the case is, I want to be like my grandfather Cecilio. I want to be a good son, cousin, nephew, uncle (and eventually father) in order to honor him. Everyone loves and admires him. He is, in many ways, our rock. he doesn't say much, but when he does you know he means it and you should be listening. He never says "I love

you". Never. Hearing him say those words is the Holy Grail of our family.

"I love you Papa Chilo"

"Me too."

But he doesn't have to say it. Because his actions speak louder than his words ever could. We know he loves us because of the way he loves us. We don't have to hear it. Our hearts know it. I had to ask him for a favor today. In an attempt to help someone else out I needed a favor from him and my grandmother. After explaining the situation to my grandmother she passed the phone to him. I explained once more. I told him, as I told my grandmother, that I was embarrassed to ask him for this favor. He immediately put me at ease. "OK. Don't worry about it."

"Are you sure? I know you generous but this also isn't anything concerning you, so if you don't want to please don't feel obligated to..."

"Don't worry we will take care of it Sunday."

It's not just that he is willing to help, it was his ability to take away the embarrassment I felt. One moment I felt ashamed. I felt like a beggar. The next moment I felt loved and cared for. Maybe that's why we love him and my grandmother so much. I want to be that for the people I care about. Whether they be family or otherwise. When my days are done I hope that I will have done enough so that the people I care about know that I loved them.

Last Thought On Flying (for now)...

Traveling on an airplane is the opposite of riding a school bus. Forget about the obvious difference that one is flying and one is driving. Think about the following:
On a bus there aren't even seatbelts. On an airplane you are consistently beaten about the head about safety measures. You are reminded what to do in case of water landings, if air pressure becomes low. Chimes consistency remind you to sit down and buckle in.

On a school bus there is nothing but energy. Kids are practically standing on the seats shouting and yelling across the bus. No one is every trying to sleep on a school bus. Hell, with all the noise from the kids I often wondered how a school bus driver could concentrate long enough to keep the thing on the road. A flight is the complete opposite. There is zero energy. People pay 9 dollars for a drink in hopes of being drunk enough to fall asleep on the plane. And even if you don't fall asleep no one talks anyone. People barely make eye contact with one another. People pray that they don't even have to sit next to anybody.
No two forms of transportation could be as disparate as a school bus and a commercial airplane.

Don't Do Nice Things For Your Children....

In my last post I lamented the future disappointment of a child who has been led to believe she has superpowers. When that child finds out that they don't control flight they are going to be incredibly disillusioned. Who cares about being able to hang upside down on the monkey bars when you though you could make airplanes shake with your mind?!

Well, I noticed a similar scenario at Dodger Stadium. I noticed a family that was having dinner on the field of Dodger Stadium after the game. The sun was beaming, round tables were covered with beautiful white cloth and chefs in aprons and hats prepared food. All the while three children, two girls around 13 and 11, and a little boy no older than 8, ran around the foul area between home and third base. Then I noticed that All-Star left fielder Andre Ethier was on the field with them. He went up to the kids. signed some balls and then he joined them and their parents at the dinner table!
Some people might have looked at this scene and thought. Wow, what a great moment for those kids. what an awesome day for them. not me though. All I kept thinking was, "how bummed out are they going to be the next time they go out to dinner."
I can see it now...
Dad yells upstairs, "Kids were going out to dinner!"
The kids run to the top of the stairs all abuzz with excitement.
"We are going to Chuck E. Cheese." The kids look puzzled. The youngest asks, "Chuck E. Cheese?"
"Yea, it's going to be great. Aren't you excited," dad asks.
"Who is going to be there", questions the 13 year old.
"Well, just us honey."
The 11 year old girl chimes in, "So no professional athletes? What about a famous actor or actress? Lady Gaga?"
Once the kids realize that it's just a regular night out they will attack.
"What gives old man! You call this quality time with your kids!?!? Don't you love us?"

Those parents have set the bar way too high now. How are they going to top that? Everything they do from now on is going to pale in comparison to that moment. Their children are going to be so underwhelmed by the rest of their lives it won't even be funny. What's worse is that other people are going to be held to those same lofty standards and expectations. Can you imagine having to take anyone of those girls to prom? You better have Shaq, Kobe or LeBron as your driver. If not she is going to be unimpressed.

Here is my point, if you are a parent, set your kids expectations low. Don't do things with them at such a young age that th rest of their life experiences seem bland. Its gotta be tough when you're eight years old and the rest of your life is all down hill.

Disillusioned Children

As I have noted, I have been traveling recently. There was a small child crying as my flight into Raleigh, North Carolina approached its landing. The kid must have been about five years old and was fidgeting and crying. And rightfully so, it was a very turbulent landing. The child's mother was anxious to have her kid stop squirming and crying so she told her child, "Look what you are making the plane do."

She actually said this to the kid.

She told her daughter that the plane was shaking uncontrollably because she couldn't stop crying. Now some people would argue that this was a traumatic and horrible thing to do to your child. 'What kind of parent puts that kind of guilt on their child', my friends say. But I am not concerned with the trauma and the guilt caused by this act. No. in fact, I have an almost opposite reaction.

What if this kid grows up to think she has superpowers? She is going to her kindergarten class on Monday proclaiming, "I can control airplanes!" How bummed is that kid going to be when she realize she doesn't? Or even worse, how scared is she going to be when she does behave during a planes descent and there is still turbulence?

That parent shouldn't be yelled at for scaring their kid, they should be chastised for setting their little one up for unbelievable disappointment when find out that you can't control airplanes.